In 1931, James Truslow Adams wrote his historical book, The Epic of America. It was Adams, in fact, who in this very book first addressed the American Dream. His definition paints it as “that dream of a land in which life should be better and richer and fuller for everyone, with opportunity for each according to ability or achievement.” I trust we have all heard of the American Dream — that depiction of the United States as a safe heaven of self fulfillment for all; Uncle Sam stretching out his hand and promising success and opportunity. Sounds great, right?

I grew up in Europe and the tale of this dream reached across the Atlantic and found my family, like many before mine. As a child I saw my father pine for freedom of expression and accomplishment is his work. America was calling and it seemed to offer answers to these needs. At the age of 13, then, I found myself on a Delta plane with my mom and dad and brothers, heading to the state of Minnesota.

After being replanted in a brand new setting, it did not take long for me to notice that I was now in a context where successful efficiency is what is strived for. At first that was great. Life was neat, everything worked, everything was in place and that made the machine function.

This “neatness” began to go sour, however, when life became a competition. At age 16, I stopped believing my peers were truly a good in my life, as competitive sports, competitive relationships, competitive colleges, internships, jobs, all began piling up. It all worked so well, but it was so suffocating. Though I realized how unnatural this way of living was, I was stuck in it. I got caught in the habit of striving for efficiency and looking out for myself. Is efficiency something we should ultimately be striving for?

We are taught that we should climb upward as far as we can go and be as efficient as possible while doing it. We are taught that we are ultimately alone in this process and that we create ourselves through our achievements. So, climbing up this ladder we lose pieces of ourselves along the way; we lose our relationships with others because they are not advancing us. This distortion of the American Dream is founded on people who look to what they have accomplished and realize they are alone. This way of living clashes immensely with my European background and upbringing. The European – particularly the Italian – mentality is community centered. Life is certainly not as efficient, even to a fault, but people are happier because they are not alone.

By making these observations, I can say with certainty that success and efficiency do not equal freedom. What we wish to accomplish is good, but we are not made to be machines and we are certainly not made to trample each other in order to fulfill ourselves. Ultimately, though I do want to have a good career life, looking back at what I have lived through I can say that I have been most fulfilled when I have loved, when I have shared my life with others. This is the freedom and happiness we should be pursuing.

Letizia Mariani can be reached at mari8259@stthomas.edu