Being about two weeks into 2017, the “new year, new me” hype has died down. No surprise there. In my experience, in fact, making a new year’s resolution changes nothing; the resolution is dropped soon after being made and it leaves behind little to no guilt. I stopped making new year’s resolutions three years ago, when I realized that the calendar changing is not a good enough reason for me to change.

When, then, do we change? If I take a look at the times I’ve been compelled to alter aspects of myself, they’ve always followed an encounter with something concrete that propelled me to change. For example, I picked up dance for a while after I discovered my back was bad. I cut down swearing after noticing that those I found most eloquent did not swear as much as I did. I started going to confession regularly after I realized it was benefitting people I trusted. In short, be it someone who makes us want to be healthier, or a situation that calls for us to step up, we rarely succeed in changing if not as a response to something. Self-standing and self-sparked change often fails, even when backed with good intentions.

Not only do we have to be moved by something in order to change, we must also be patient. Change happens every day in small and perhaps unnoticeable steps, only through patience. In this time of immediate gratification, it can be difficult to truly work on oneself because progress cannot be truly noticed.

Ultimately, instead of making ridiculous resolutions for the new year, the sensible thing to do would be pay attention to our lives, find what makes us want to strive for something better and patiently follow that until we discover ourselves changed.

Letizia Mariani can be reached at mari8295@stthomas.edu.